Whaoow!!!

today talked with couple people at work

OMG!!

those customers there are just ridiculasly low-- i mean lower than i thought they are

extremely low--

i didn't talk about cheap though

well that is i guess their habit or behavior

but calling african-american with N word or using the word black is just wow!

just disgusting!

still i don't know how did they choose Ct or ppl who hold card-

i know it isn't my problem as long as they don't come and get on my face,but still wow!

wow!

just pure wow!

what do i want to be/

there are....

so  many type of people at my work..

one that do their own business and still love to mind others people business

one that think that they already finished their own business and love to mind other people business

one that no matter what still have to mind other people business

one that don't really care other people business ,but love to be in other people business way

one that doesn't really care,but pretend like they care and fuck others people at their back

one that doesn't care, doesn't mind and just focusing on their own business -this is good

and one that i have no idea whattafuck does they want- doesn't do their own business,but love to put their word in other people business and talk shit about others

wow!

so many morons around

gotta have my guard up otherwise sooner or later i will turn to be same as them

just talking about it- already disgust me, make me sick and

wow! the more you work with them, the more you just want to get out of there as fast as possible

it is just weird

it might have culture involving with it,but let's hope

there is in every job

there will be couple asshole in organization

there will be one stupid moron fuck that i have to face everyday

there will be really awesome sweetheart that everyone so adore

there will be a joker in the job

there will be one up-tight people that don't even care what is going on with work like me

there will be the always optimistic people and still have people talking shit behind their back

there will be bunches of people working together and a lot of them that doesn't get along

let's see how many people that i don't even want to look

iiii

how many people that if i don't have to talk, i won't even care to talk to

iiii

how many people that i never feel like have to talk to -never want to even say hi

iiiiiiii

-- this number is assuming, there are bunches of people there, that i know they don't even care about me and i don't even care they exist!

oh well my life is just great!

-compare this number is just less than 50 percent of people who are working there

nicee!!!



If I?

Watched CSI tonight and there is one episode that a guy is so in love

with the prostitute and really want to get her out of there,

 but she doesn't even care.

She is hot, sexy, pretty and I believe she is all everything I don't have.

 I can't do sweet-talk, can't use the right word to make guys fall in love with me, not sexy, got zero in feminine thing. All I have is just the way I am.

I can't make guy fall on their feet in love with me. Can't make any guys spend thousand of thousand on me.

 What if I could do that. Be so pretty and sweet.

Can make all guys in the world do everything for me.

What will make the different to me.

Just wondering maybe just one day

to feel how that feel will be

 extremely awesome!!

Way back in my freshmen year in college.

Tonight was extremely dull!

Oh well what can I say.

 I got no creativity of thinking where to go out at night,my husband is such a non- catholic mind( I ain't talking about religious, just saying it out loud here) and my city is just dead after 10 pm or maybe it has something to do but according to those reasons that I mentioned earlier so i have no idea what is going on.

 No drink, no drug or no feeling of going out wasting money so yes! Just fuck me with my

" I have no idea what to do tonight"

Okay just deleted everything that I just wrote and back to my title said!!

 Freshmen in college

It was a time that I started to go out socialized more.

 Like go to concerts, those radio events that I got free VIP ticket, go out parties and yes dancing.

 Lucky me that not all my friend's like to drink so I'm good and always safe to get home.

Here if you see me now and then- you will know that I'm unattractive woman.

I mean not at all so I'm usually be the one who like this guy, like that guy and yes!

 None of them like me and I'm 100% sure and well I actually don't even give a damn about it. Just having fun saying he is cute.

 Love his smile.

Nothing more, nothing less.

Then there was a time that I went to see acoustic concert with my friend

. Well I saw this band on tv and be honestly to you. I have relly low down to the ground self-esteem so all I think about guys is they only think of me as a friend and I'm that kinda girl who talks about everything. Into motorcycle and don't put any make up on.

 Don't you think that I don't want to. I want to be extremely hot with make up but I know that even magic make up still can't help me ahit so what am I have to waste money and time with it then.

Okay back to concert. My friend and I was given VIP pass for concert so we were sitting in front of the band and hey those musician are pretty cute.

Well not my type, but they are definitely good looking guys. There is a guitar guy that I noticed couple time that he looked at me bit again as I always think to myself. He probably never seen any gal with ton of acne on her face so with that thoughts.

 I don't even care shit. Then a week or month passed, I met them

Again at the bar I went to.

 Well I noticed cuz they are a band so everybody wanna talk to them. And yes, I noticed again that he looked at me with smile.

Okay then he might be remember me from the concert. I didn't talk with him but I kept look at him and yes I see him smile back everytime he saw me looking.

A month passed by, my college got annually concert and yes his band was one of the highlight of the show.

 I was in the club so most of the time, I stood at my booth, helped my friend and Serling some snack. He came walk pass with his friend and decided to sit in front of me chilling. I think that's the first time ever that I feel Luke he is interested in me.

Or maybe not, but yeah! We never talked.. I know that he has girlfriend by that time even they broke up not too ling after that and even I saw him couple times at my school again, I never showed up around him ever.

 Call me coward, but that's just the way I am.

It was the first time ever that I feel like I have some guy interested in me or yes!

 I might be wrong just think I might have some guy like me.

That's it!!

Funny when I went on YouTube tonight and saw his song.

 It reminded me of one of those days. Interesting!

Then I thinking back what if I have courage to walk up to him and say hi.

What If all I think is wrong.

 What if I thought he has his interests in me,but actually my friend.

That's all I'm just wanna say about it!!